Ask Lemmy

I just learned the other day that in English "you" is the old formal.

Here in Pennsylvania, we know that Quakers used thee and thou far longer than anyone else. Turns out, that was a protest movement. You and yours were used for nobility and royalty, the piece I was reading said the "royal we" is a leftover from this setup.

As a protest against classism and politics, Quakers refused to use you and yours at all and used thee and thou for everyone regardless of status. Instead, common usage English went the other way and adopted you and yours for everyone.

My mother met old Quaker ladies in the 1950s who still used thee and thou in common conversation.

I live in Japan, and of course there are formal ways to say everything, but in formal and polite situations, people actually try to avoid saying 'you' (anata, 貴方) as much as possible. Because even that can feel too personal. I only see it in writing that addresses the reader indirectly, like in surveys.

If you do address or refer to them, you typically use their title/position (e.g., 'sensei' for doctors and teachers, 'Mr. President'), or name and appropriate honorific (e.g., Tanaka-san).

P.S., a lot of what might've been archaically formal and polite ways to say 'you' have become ironically rude and/or condescending. Like, 'KISAMA!' (貴様), kimi (君) (sovereign/lord), onushi (お主) (lord).

In French/France I use the formal vous when talking to strangers or customers. Here people generally switch pretty quickly to the informal tu when they get to know each other (at my first day at work with my colleagues and boss). But I'm quite an oddball since I use the formal address even for kids, which no one does. Also my neighbor was a bit annoyed at me for continuing to say vous to her after having met her one month ago. It can make people feel old.

Dutch is now my main language. I rarely, almost never, use the formal "U" or "Uw". It's an archaic thing.

I notice it's still in use in government communication. I also notice it in (older) literature.