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Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
I do events, one of the events was a medical conference. We had an exec for a pharmaceutical company presenting and he wanted the entire stage layout changed 45 minutes before the presentation. Like completely different projectors, screens, mics, that sort of thing. Not a quick fix by any means. We told him it wasn’t possible, his response,
“Anything is possible if money and physics allow it, and I have money.”
Their pharmaceutical company wasn’t invited back to the next years event. We were.
I'm a union organizer, so I got to see some truly golden moments. My favorite was during a campaign, we took over a Q&A session with a member of the C-suite present. In a previous meeting he tried to convince me of some bs, so I asked him directly "why did you lie to me?" during this take over. The look on his face was priceless, and it took him over a minute to respond pathetically with "I don't appreciate being called a liar"
Can you tell us any more about the lie and the rest of the response? Sounds juicy
Yea for sure! We were organizing around performance metrics, quotas, discipline, etc for quite a while. My work is in QA, where quotas are actually really bad for software development. We had been trying to get management to research and implement modern QA practices that would reduce/eliminate quotas, without much success. We also wanted progressive discipline with real guidance, because if you don't meet metrics then the performance improvement plan (pip) was really just a do-or-die meet the metrics for 10 days or get fired.
In the previous meeting, it wasn't a take over but coworkers and I relentlessly asked about pips, metrics, etc. We were very clearly getting under their skin, to the point where he asked me how I felt pips should work. He was probably thinking I never planned that far ahead and would discredit myself, but I had done significant research on modern QA management techniques and gave an overview of my minimum for a 3 step pip. Right before he ended the meeting, he essentially "confirmed" that we do it exactly like that, no sword of Damocles or anything.
Of course having done the legwork to actually talk to employees that had gone through the process, we knew that it was total horseshit. Just to be sure, we talked to a few more people to confirm that pips were still being used to cut people for cause instead of improving their metrics before planning the takeover. To open the meeting, I asked this to the COO:
I'd like to preface my question by saying thank you for hosting these sessions again, and preemptively note that a lot of us are here to discuss PIPs. In the last Q&A session I attended, I was told by you that PIPs follow a progressive discipline model. However, we're aware that most if not all employees that fail a PIP are terminated immediately, and multiple employees have been fired shortly after passing a PIP for failing to meet productivity expectations. Why did you lie to me?
His face went beet red and you could see the anger build in his eyes. After about a minute, he responds with "I don't appreciate being called a liar. You're hostility isn't welcome and I reject the question". After that, you could cut the tension with a knife. I reiterated my question that pips don't work the way he said they do, but he continued to refuse it until I moved on to the many other "hostile" questions I had.
For the aftermath, he lied to us again in that meeting when someone uninvolved with the take over asked about remote work, and said there's no plans to change anything for the foreseeable future, before RTO was announced a week later. There was another meeting about RTO with him that I attended, and he made a vague threat about "respectability" and ending the meeting if he felt disrespected after looking at the attendees. I wanted to ask a legit question over mic, and he ignored me until it was becoming obvious to others in the meeting. He stopped doing all q&a stuff after this for some reason.
I worked security for a pro baseball stadium. Some guy and his teenage sons had front row season tickets behind home base. The boys were underage and openly drinking alcohol. We went to tell them the kids had to cut it out.
This guy (who was drunk too) throws a fit that we dared tell him what he could do. He starts shouting "do you know how much I pay for these tickets!? My sons can do whatever they want" blah blah blah.
I wave down the security head and he radios for the police to come deal with it. The man and his sons were marched out to boos from the crowd. They were ejected from the game and fined. They potentially lost their season ticket rights too, but I don't know for sure. I never saw them again though.
Good on you, fuck em
We took a trip to Chicago and decided to go to Navy Pier. Traffic was basically gridlocked and the car behind us was not happy that my friend didn't break the law and block an intersection. After the light turned green, the idiot took his massive, shiny, brand new, white pickup truck onto the SIDEWALK to cut in front of us.
When we got to the parking garage, there was a HUGE sign saying the clearance was 6ft 3in and tall vehicles needed to go to a different garage. The idiot didn't read it and, even with the windows shut, we heard the screeching and scraping of his roof on the top of the structure.
The best part was watching him back out, hearing more scraping, seeing his surprised pikachu face, and the disappointment on the face of the woman in the passenger seat.
That video of the rich prick at a coffee shop who throws something at the worker and then gets put in a headlock and held on the ground and struggles weakly
I only heard about it after it happened. Guy in the last year of high school said his parents wanted him to go to college but he probably wouldn’t because that was “stupid” or something similar. Girl in the group blew up on him because she desperately wanted an education and couldn’t afford tuition basically anywhere. She called him spoiled and selfish, I believe.
At a concert and saw the police approach and start questioning a young drunk guy (out doors, before show started). They basically said he had to leave on account of being too intoxicated and he started getting mouthy. I've never seen the police react so quickly the moment he finished saying, "My dad is a top class expensive lawyers and he'll have your asrses for this" - he was in the ground and handcuffed within seconds. In the next few seconds he was back on his feet and being escorted to the paddy wagon.
I have this pet theory about how people who learn that their privilege lets them bend or ignore human laws subconsciously believe that they can bend or ignore any law. So I always enjoy it when rich assholes buy super-cars and wrap them around trees, a surprisingly common occurrence, because the laws of physics aren't impressed by your financial portfolio.
The Titanic submarine
This is not that funny but I was amused watching it happen. One time I was at the DMV in a college town and a kid was at the counter trying to get his license renewed. From what I could gather he had it revoked because he was underage and had a DUI. Lady at the counter bounced the kid and a few minutes later, the kid came back in with his father and they were apparently from a rich family. Or at least rich by Ohio standards. When the lady at the counter explained that he could not have his license renewed because he had a court order against him, the father started in on the "Do you know who I am? I will buy this whole town!" routine, but the DMV lady was not having any of it. Both the kid and the father insisted that the judge did not have any right to take his license away from him and that it would be over turned on appeal so the DMV lady had to give him his license, because dad would make sure she got fired if he didn't. But the DMV lady would not relent and issue a license. The father and kid were getting pretty animated, so finally the lady picked up the phone and said something to the effect of "Your kid lied on this form and is probably violating his probation, we can call the court right now and see what your judge thinks about that." Which at that point caused them to sheepishly leave. When I got to the counter she told me that was not the first time in her career someone tried to do that to her.
She's weaponizing the soulcrushing banality of the DMV for good! Her deadpan face and stolid "I'm here all day anyway" refusal to give an inch, and then the little chink of sunshine through her castle wall as she helped you, a normal person who treated her with respect.
Probably this one.
It's in the running for GOAT. Time will tell
Harry gripped his wand, and thought of his mother.
That submarine imploding near the Titanic will never be not funny. Especially since the guy who designed it believed in the "move fast and break things" nonsense.
Every person on board paid a pretty penny to be on that sub, so no pity from me either (except perhaps for the teenager who was reportedly terrified to go on, but did it to please his rich prick father).
