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I cry everytime
I can't see this product without thinking of astronaut Chris Hadfield. He tells a story of going blind in space, because they apply a surfactant to the inside of the EVA helmet as an anti-fog coating, it's basically a mix of oil and soap. And a drop of it got in his eye, while in a spacewalk, it stung and his eye slammed shut and began to tear up, and because zero g, tears don't fall, so it just pooled in his eye socket until there was enough tears for it to spill over the bridge of his nose into the other eye.
"Now we use Johnson's No More Tears, Which is what we should have been using from the beginning."
Spraying it into my eyeballs in tears YOU BASTARDS