this post was submitted on 10 Dec 2025
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I'd be tempted to go all patriot on them:
"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."
Shout "those against freedom and the pursuit happiness, are enemies of america!"
I do that one a lot too when talking about immigrants. “No you misunderstood. We are a nation of immigrants but my family wasn’t. My families been here since the late 1600s. America formed around us. Like lt Dan, a member of my family fought and died in every American war. This is my damn country and you’re not going to shut MY DOOR behind you. I want immigrants in MY country. If you don’t like it here, you leave. They can stay”
I also have Native American blood in me but not enough to brag about.
I’m also technically a Mormon priest so I declare drag shows to be biblically fine. Not a sin at all. I bless them.
I call it the “out pizza the hut strategy” oh you’re family lived in this town 150 years? That’s adorable. The largest man made lake in Texas is named after my great grandfather. Your family is just on vacation compared to mine.